The Week on Twitter: 28 February, 2011

• @VictoriaCoren I know an old man who hawks car insurance. You should have a word with him. #
• I'm going to save up and buy a forest. Then I'll do it up a bit and have you all round. #
• @DANIELmadison Congratulations! #
• Just took delivery of some Bulldog Squeezers. Yeah, thought you'd be jealous. #
• @AidanJohnMoffat haha, good guess! But Bulldog Squeezers are actually a really old type of playing cards with a weird design on the back. #
• @AidanJohnMoffat haha! #
• Listening to Kerrang Radio. See if @plasmatron fucking swears. #
• Turns out the traditional translation of 'Gaddafi' is: 'delusional autocratic potato in bad wig'. #
• *PLEASE PLACE THE ITEM IN THE BAGGING AREA* It is *PLEASE PLACE THE*** It IS in the fucking bagging area!! *UNEXPECTED ITEM IN BAGGING AREA* #
• Fuck you Asda. The robot has got three shots… and if it can't get it right, I'm just nicking stuff. #