Bought some materials from Miller's today. For the last six months I've lied about being a student in this particular branch in order to get a discount. And this one girl always asks about how my work's going and stuff. I actually thought that she realised I was lying and just gave me a discount anyway. So today she caught me off guard by pitching a series of student questions at me... Had I got my degree show together in time? Was my space any good? Had I got my mark yet?...blah blah blah. I played along, being really vague...Yes thanks, I got everything sorted out. My space is amazing. I'm not sure when the marks are out. Then I had to feign interest in her anecdotes regarding her own degree show. Because, you see, she already graduated from Dundee last year blah blah yawn.

Since this transaction was in fact the last one eligible for my 'student discount' I briefly considered looking her straight in the eye and saying in a calm and sane fashion:

'Okay, the game's up. I am in fact no longer an art student; my degree show went fine thanks and now I have a studio where I continue to make work. I am happy to forfeit my fraudulent ten per-cent discount henceforth in the understanding that you will discontinue your dull and self-satisfied references to your status as an art graduate immediately'.

What actually happened was that she said she might look out for my work and I saved two pounds on three tubes of gouache. So kids, the moral of the story is this: Get out of art school and keep your mouth shut, whether you're trying to impress people or rip people off.
Posted on Burning Salad on Thu 19th Jun, 7:24 am
http://www.gregorwright.com/salad/hey/13/