Grapes Of Wrath

I was on the train on my way home tonight, minding my own business, glued to my Gameboy when suddenly a gang of young bams hopped on. One of them made a beeline for me and started glaring over my shoulder at point blank range, half shouting ‘You’vegotwanaytheynewGameboys. Whitgameisit?’ Then he sat down right next to me, virtually on my lap, before suddenly standing up, whirling round and half shouting at a cheery looking middle aged lady ‘Whit ur you laughin’ at’? (She was clearly laughing at a grown man telling a ten year old that he was playing Final Fantasy Tactics on his Gameboy). But before she had time to answer he shouted ‘Shut up or I’ll smash ye ower the heid wey a grape’. Then the train stopped and they all piled off, filling the night air with variations of the word ‘fuck’, and sure enough, rather absurdly the young toerag was in possession of a bunch of grapes.